マルコム迷言集

マルコム迷言集

シーズン１
 シーズン２
 シーズン３
 シーズン４
 シーズン５
 シーズン６
 シーズン７

シーズン１

Season No.	迷言（原語）	迷言（日本語）
＃１	Lois: You kids, you just take your legs for granted, you know, like nothing could ever happen to them. Well, let me tell you something: that is just wishful thinking. There's meningitis, there are car accidents, I could be giving you a spanking and accidentally snap your spinal cord. Every day is a lottery, and first prize is that you don't have to scoot yourselves around town on a skateboard with your hands. You think about that. Lois: There's nothing wrong with being smart. There's nothing wrong with being cut from the herd, either. It makes you the one buffalo who isn't there when the Indians run the rest of them off the cliff. Malcolm: Huh? Lois: I saw his mother at the grocery store, she said you boys ate lunch together. Malcolm: One time! He rolled his wheelchair over next to me. It's not like I could say go away. Malcolm: If I give up now, I won't get the lecture. Lois: You kids... Malcolm: Dang! Dewey: I don't take my legs for granted, Mom. Lois: I know honey, you're a good boy. Stop playing with yourself. Lois: Two of you can have slices of pizza for lunch, the other one can have, eh... I don't know, I think they're peas. Lois: Hey Francis, how's school? Francis: Oh, couldn't be better, Mom. My new roommate showed me how to kill mice with a hammer yesterday. So, you know, between that and the general atmosphere of simmering homoeroticism, I think I'm really starting to turn around. Caroline Miller: Could you, you know, maybe put a top on? Lois: They're just boobs, lady, you see them in the mirror every morning, and I'm sure yours are a lot nicer than mine. Lois: It's about Malcolm. Malcolm: I didn't do it. Reese: Yes he did it, I saw him. Lois: They have a special program for gifted children. They have advanced textbooks and devoted teachers and all sorts of good things they don't want to waste on normal kids. Lois: Sweetie, life does not give you a lot of chances to move up, even if you deserve it. Look at your dad and me. Lois: I mean, look at those Parker boys across the street. They may be healthy but, honest to god, those are the ugliest little boys ever born, they look like boiled beads, don't you think? And those Henderson kids, that electrocuted their dog when they were trying to get free cable, how smart can they be? And your friend Richard... Malcolm: He's not ugly or dumb! Lois: Yes. But he's very effeminate. Lois: Any kid who makes fun of you is a creepy little loser who'll end up working in a car wash. Malcolm: This shouldn't make me feel better. But it does. Hal: They're sending an unmanned probe to Venus and letting a bunch of school children name it. That's gonna end badly. Hal: Malcolm's special? Where do you think that came from? Francis: Dad, I know what you're going to say, and believe me, I totally agree with you. There is no excuse for what I did. It was idiotic, immature, totally reckless, and I'm really sorry. I'm just hoping against hope that you will give me another chance, which I admit I don't deserve. If you could just find it in your heart to forgive me, I know I could earn your trust back. Malcolm: It's not like it was even our car! Reese: He goes to parties, drinks beer, and goes skiing. Malcolm: Right, genius! They do lots of skiing in Alabama. Malcolm: What d'you do if he catches you? Dewey: Roll in a ball. Malcolm: What if he starts kicking you? Dewey: Stay in a ball. Malcolm: You wanna know what the best thing about childhood is? At some point it stops. Caroline Miller: Now, you can look at this picture for 60 seconds and I want you to tell me everything that's wrong with it. Okay? Malcolm: The man only has four fingers. Caroline Miller: Right, but this time I want you to really take your time and really look at... Malcolm: The car's shadow's going the wrong way, the steering wheel's on the wrong side, there's no brake pedal, the words in the mirror should be backwards, the man's watch wouldn't say twelve o'clock if he was looking at a sunset, and I have red paint on my ass. That's right - red paint all over my ass. Malcolm: I want a better family! Malcolm: Why do they keep doing that? Stevie Kenarban: You're new. Malcolm: Oh great, so I'm the freak of the freakshow? Malcolm: Oh sure, you're okay because this doesn't make any difference to you. You've always been a freak. I used to be normal. Wait... who just said that? You're gonna take that the wrong way, aren't you? Stevie Kenarban: You... suck! Malcolm: Around here, being smart is exactly like being radioactive. Malcolm: Okay, it wasn't funny when Spath started cryting. No wait, it was!	Ｌ「狩人に追いつめられずに済むたった一頭のバッファローになれる」Ｌ「パーカーさんちの子をみなさい。元気だけど正直言って世界一不細工よ。腐った大根みたいな顔してる」Ｌ「あんたをからかう子は、洗車係りで一生を終えるチンケなクズ連中」
＃２	Lois: In your room [evil voice] Lois: NOW!
＃３	Lois: Dewey, I need to talk to Francis. Dewey: He can't come to the phone. He's in the bathroom. Lois: Well, put Malcolm on the phone. Dewey: He can't come to the phone. He's in the bathroom. Lois: They're both in the bathroom? Dewey, what's going on? Dewey: I have to go to the bathroom. Francis: Did you guys see Circus break that cinder block with his head? That's a good lesson for you guys: it didn't break the first six times, but did he quit trying? No sir... Francis: There. Finished. Reese: It's never been this clean before. Malcolm: Uh-Oh. It's too clean. Francis: You're right. She'll never buy it. Francis: Oh, great, a one-way street. How does that work if I'm going backwards?
＃４	[Malcolm has just beaten up a seven-year-old] Malcolm: I did something horrible. Don't you even care? Hal: Well, it's nothing to be proud of son, but you told us the whole story and he didn't give you much choice. It was an honest beating mistake. Reese: Besides it sends a good message to our enemies. Malcolm: What are you talking about? What enemies? Reese: Oh, they're out there. And once they know we're capable of this they'll know were capable of anything.
＃５	Hal: Look at that sky, Malcolm. Just think, somewhere out there, all those stars and planets, there might be at this very moment a space dad who just got kicked out of his space trailer, who's looking down on us. Or would it be up at us? Or maybe sideways. Malcolm: Trust me, dad, they're all looking down on us.
＃６	Lois: You know how your father feels about evil puppet movies. Stevie: What's that? Malcolm: A stripped car Stevie: What's that? Malcolm: A naked man arguing with the wall. Stevie: What's that? Malcolm: A nudy book store - with my dad coming out of it.
＃７	Dewey: And then the monster started growling at me, so I threw rocks at him, and I killed him, and then he started flying around on rocket boost, and I got to ride inside his head, and now the monster's my friend, and we wen - and we went to get Slurpees. Reese: You did not. You just lied. Hal: Reese, if that's what Dewey says happened there's no reason to argue about it. Reese: No one believes I beat the last level in Mortal Kombat. Hal: Because that's just ridiculous. No one beats Sub-Zero. Francis: Good job, dipwad. You got me in the nards.
＃８	[talking about Malcolm's class picnic] Malcolm: There won't be any meat. They all decided they didn't want to eat anything that has a mother. Dewey: Cousin Nancy doesn't have a mother. Lois: That's right. She has two daddies. Reese: Two guys as your parents? That house has to be a dude's paradise. Jody: [Jody, Francis' new girlfriend whom he met mere hours ago] Oh my God, you're Francis' dad? He talks about you all the time! Hal: Really? You too! Malcolm: In the wrong hands, these chemicals could make a really powerful stink bomb. My hands look wrong enough.
＃９
＃１０
＃１１	Lois: We're on our way to Aunt Helen's funeral. Francis: Aunt Helen died? Lois: Well, I sure hope so, we're going to her funeral. Francis: [Francis is on the phone to Dewey] Dewey, how did Aunt Helen die? Dewey: Cats ate her face Francis: No, Dewey. I'm asking about Aunt Helen. Dewey: Cats ate her face. Francis: Look, will you just put dad on the phone. Hal: [Dewey hands the phone to Hal] Hello? Francis: Dad. How did Aunt Helen die? Hal: Cats ate her face, here talk to Dewey he knows more about it than I do	Ｆ「おばさん本当に死んだの？」Ｌ「たぶん間違いないわ、お葬式だから」
＃１２	Dewey: Does this means Reese's a girl now? Malcolm: No Dewey, he's a lady. Reese: Shut up. Malcolm: Yes Ma'am. [Malcolm is unable to talk Reese out of becoming a cheerleader... ] Malcolm: I tried talking to him, I gave him advice, I tried reasoning with him, there's only one thing left to do: Sit back and laugh my ass off.
＃１３	Malcolm: My dad's like a total fanatic about skating. He doesn't even call it skating, he calls it the brotherhood of the wheel.
＃１４	Lois: [to Commandant Edwin Spangler who has an eyepatch] Hey, where's your eye? Hal: Look, Fats, I don't want you around my house no more. Craig Feldspar: Hey, you don't go to the fat thing and I won't go to the crazy thing. Hal: [sitting on Craig and patting his belly continuously] Say uncle! Craig Feldspar: No! Hal: Just say it! We can end this right now with a little dignity if you just say it. One simple word. Craig Feldspar: Duncle. Hal: Aha, you said duncle. Now you gotta say "uncle" in my butt.
＃１５	Reese: I was really adopted, wasn't I? Lois: No, you're ours. And we love you. Reese: Damn. Salesman: This may sound cliché, Hal, but what can I do to put you in that car today? Hal: You can give me $90,000. Malcolm: Mom said you ratted on us about Dewey's bike. But she's probably just mixed up, right? Because you're our big brother and you wouldn't do something like that... Francis? Francis: You don't know what kind of pressure I was under. I... Malcolm: [shouts] You butt-wipe! How could you? Francis: Put Justin on the phone. Justin: You the man, Francis! You the man! Francis: Put Richie back on the phone. Malcolm: Hey, you can tear up the house if you want - with my mom here - and explain it to her, or you can quit and slink away like the monosyllabic mouth-breeders you are. Francis: What did he say? Richie: He said a lot of things! Malcolm: You know, Francis, we never actually intended to show that letter to Mom. We were just trying to scare you. Francis: I know, you guys would never do that to me. Malcolm: But if she did see the letter, you know it was an accident, right? Francis: Yeah, but Richie has the letter. Please tell me Richie has the letter. Malcolm: Richie has coupons. Mom has the letter. But like I said, it was just an accident. I swear. Francis: So the thing you were threatening to do all day but had no intention of doing you did, but didn't mean to?
＃１６	Commandant Spangler: Once again, I waltz with Lady Victory. And until you focus, Francis, she is never going to be your dance partner.

シーズン２

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（１７）
＃２（１８）	Malcolm: Apparently the difference between a stink bomb and a Level 3 toxic biohazard is two extra drops of sulfur tetraoxide. I am totally suing that Web site.
＃３（１９）
＃４（２０）
＃５（２１）
＃６（２２）
＃７（２３）
＃８（２４）
＃９（２５）
＃１０（２６）	Malcolm: Those guys are nuts. I'm funny!... Aren't I funny? Lloyd: To be honest, you can be a little caustic. Stevie: The word... is arrogant. Dabney: How about bitter, sarcastic and handsome? [Lloyd and Stevie turn to look at him] Dabney: [points somewhere] Hey, she's cute. Rick: Remember me? 'Moby Rick'? [sarcastic] Rick: That was so hilarious. Malcolm: I never called you Moby Rick. I called you Rickapotamus, although... [Rick punches him]	「オレをバカにしたろ、太めのジョナサンって呼んで」Ｍ「違うよ、重めのジョナサンって言ったんだ」
＃１１（２７）	Hal: Reese, one man's purse is another man's backpack. Hal: One boy's purse is another boy's book bag... if he's European. Besides, I can't tell you how many times I've been jealous of your mother and her purse. You know, we men have to shove our whole lives in a little square of leather, that we then have to sit on. Reese: [Yelling at Dewey while throwing rocks at him] I'm trying to protect you. Mrs. Griffen: What are you? Malcolm: You mean like, how old? Mrs. Griffen: No, what are you? Pollack? Swede? Hipachi? Malcolm: I really don't know. Mrs. Griffen: Aw, a mutt. Well, whatever you are, stay away from my liquor.
＃１２（２８）
＃１３（２９）	Dewey: Their gnome wants to eat me. It's evil. Lois: They're all evil, sweetie. Reese: I'm completely defenseless. Malcolm: Reese, she's four. You're bigger and smarter than... well, you're bigger.
＃１４（３０）
＃１５（３１）	Lois: You brought a live grenade into my home. ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE? Grandpa Victor: Because of what just happened, you want us to loan you $3,000? Hal: Please. I know you're uncomfortable loaning to family, so let me be clear. With one phone call, I could have your asses thrown in jail for child endangerment. So, this money I'm asking for is not a loan. It's blackmail. Grandma Ida: He's like your cousin Vaslefdt all over again.
＃１６（３２）
＃１７（３３）	Lois: Malcolm, what are you walking like that? Malcolm: My side still hurts. Lois: But it's the weekend.
＃１８（３４）
＃１９（３５）
＃２０（３６）
＃２１（３７）	Reese, Malcolm: Happy Dance, Happy Dance, we love to do the Happy Dance. Francis: Happier. Reese, Malcolm: Happy Dance, Happy Dance, we love to do the Happy Dance.
＃２２（３８）
＃２３（３９）	Malcolm: Reese, we are not leaving Stevie behind. Reese: Maybe it's his time, what do we know? Who are we to play God?
＃２４（４０）
＃２５（４１）	Lois: You put the baby in the closet? Hal: You left the milk on the table? [Hal is trying to educate two-year-old Reese] Hal: [singing to the tune of 1812 overture] Art / Mona Lisa was by Da Vinci / Science / The Radio was made by Marconi / Math / 9 is the product of 3 times 3 / Natural Science / Darwin once said we all come from monkeys / But not literally. Lois: [nine months pregnant with Malcolm] Someone's benefiting from that, and it's not Reese. [close-up of Lois' enlarged chest] Lois: He's two years old and still calls you "phone". [Hal leaves] Young Reese: Phone go bye-bye.	Ｌ「まだ２才（リース）で、あなたを電話って呼んでる」

シーズン３

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（４２）	Reese: Here's proof that I went to that all-girls camp. I have this thong right here. Malcolm: That's probably just Mom's. Reese: If it were Mom's, would I do this? [puts nose into thong and inhales through nose]
＃２（４３）
＃３（４４）
＃４（４５）
＃５（４６）
＃６（４７）
＃７（４８）	Lois: I am not canceling Christmas, I'm just holding it hostage. Hal: You are a wonderful mother and you're a wonderful person. Francis: [On the phone] Hey Mom, it's Francis. I just want you to know that I am disgusted with the way you treat Grandma. Abandoning a helpless old woman on Christmas. I hope you're ashamed of yourself. Francis: What are these doing in your closet? Grandma Ida: They're gifts. For the family, for relatives. For friends. Francis: But you never give presents... Oh my God, Donatello with pizza-throwing action? I wanted one of these when I was six. Grandma Ida: I know you did. I bought that for you. And then, right before Christmas, your mommy put you on the phone, you called me "poopie" and hung up. Grandma Ida: You do this to torture me? To hurt me? Francis: You don't like Christmas music? Grandma Ida: It sounds like the song they sang when they would run through the villages and throw the babies into the fire. Francis: They sang Jingle Bells? Grandma Ida: They sang something. Francis: Why don't you just unhinge your jaw and finish me off? Grandma Ida: After my Magnum P.I. Francis: Why don't you do the entire family a favor, and just die? Malcolm: Hey. This is supposed to be to Dewey from both us. Reese: I picked it out. Malcolm: I stepped in it. Dewey: She's stealing Christmas. Malcolm: Mom, you can't do this. Reese: Yeah, this is the last year Dewey'll believe in Santa Claus. Dewey: What? Grandma Ida: I should've kissed your boo-boos and made them better. I was supposed to tell the bad little boy stories and bake you giant sugar cookies and knit you nice, fluffy sweaters. I should've carried you and held you and told you how much I loved your diapers.	R「来年はデューイがサンタを信じてないかもしれないのに？」
＃８（４９）
＃９（５０）
＃１０（５１）	Lois: Oh, my God, is that right? What time do you have? Cashier: 5:45? Lois: 5:45. That's not possible. Dropped off Malcolm, picked up Reese, dinner is in the oven. Hah? Cashier: What is it? Lois: I have the next 25 minutes free. Cashier: How did you manage that? Did you leave a kid somewhere? Lois: No. No, they are all accounted for. Cashier: What're you gonna do?
＃１１（５２）
＃１２（５３）
＃１３（５４）	Malcolm: Why do we have to get dressed up for Reese's court date? Lois: So the judge will see that he comes from a good family who loves him. Dewey: Why aren't they trying him as an adult? [Reese wants to get his learner's permit] Hal: Reese surrounded by 6,000 pounds of steel and 20 gallons of explosive fuel. It's like giving a shark a submachine gun. Teen: I can't believe I have to be in the same car as a low life like you! Reese: Oh, I'm a low-life? You're the one that spends everyday at lunch sucking on a straw that's been under my armpit.
＃１４（５５）	Hal: [Trying to fly a kite, and gets wrapped up in the string] I'm sick of this! I HATE KITES! I HAVE ALWAYS HATED KITES!!!
＃１５（５６）	Lois: Sorry it's so cramped, Piama. This van really isn't designed to carry seven people. Piama: Oh, I guess I was thrown off by the seven seats and the seven seatbelts.
＃１６（５７）	Reese: So, "Dad", you gonna ground me? Ed: Geez, your counselor was furious. Reese: All right, now that that's done, why don't we just go home? I could jump in your Jacuzzi, and you could throw something on the barbecue for me. Ed: I have a better idea. Why don't we just go home? I could jump in myJacuzzi, and you could throw something on the barbecue for me. Reese: What are you talking about? Ed: Well, let's just say, that with the information your counselor gave me, I could call your mom, and you won't see daylight for years. Reese: Oh, yeah? Well, I'll tell your secret to your wife. Ed: Well, I guess the question is, am I more scared of my wife... or are you more scared of your mother? Stevie: Social skills 10? Malcolm: I have social skills, jackass. Dewey: Eat chalk, evil-doer.
＃１７（５８）	Commandant Edwin Spangler: [after Francis found him another job in a retirement home] You call that a collage. It is an insult to the craft, I can see paste coming up from the popsicle stick. Inuit Woman: I'm sorry, I have arthritis. Commandant Edwin Spangler: That's it, you have just lost pudding for the whole group. Feel free to thank Mrs. Meektijuk after I leave. [the former Commandant Spangler leaves and other eldery residents started despising him the same way Francis and Eric did at Marlin Academy]
＃１８（５９）
＃１９（６０）	Dr. Kennedy: And how do see your place in this family? Dewey: Well, I'm the favorite. You know, the one everybody loves the most. The cute one, the one everybody looks out for and gives presents to. And sometimes they even make the birds sing to me or the clouds spell out my name.
＃２０（６１）
＃２１（６２）
＃２２（６３）

シーズン４

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（６４）
＃２（６５）
＃３（６６）
＃４（６７）
＃５（６８）
＃６（６９）
＃７（７０）
＃８（７１）	Otto: How far do you think we've gone? Hal: Well, judging by that rock formation over there, about twelve feet. Francis: [having lit a huge firecracker] Did it say when our vision would come back? Reese: Box said two days. Francis: Totally worth it. Dewey: I kind of feel like I'm floating. Gretchen: Vell, zat's probably ze ammonia.
＃９（７２）
＃１０（７３）
＃１１（７４）
＃１２（７５）
＃１３（７６）	Hal: [Hiding in a playhouse] You're an idiot. Everybody in this playhouse is an idiot. Teen: Ha ha, you just called yourself an idiot.
＃１４（７７）
＃１５（７８）	Policeman: Sir, do you know why I pulled you over? Hal: Certainly not for operating an illegal pirate radio station. I mean, even if I did have the equipment in college, I wouldn't have kept it and be using it today. What's with all these questions? Do you have a warrant? Hal: And then the stop sign army springs into action all in support of the military industrial country club complex. Dewey: Malcolm, in school we learned the coolest thing: there were these people that did this broadcast to convince everyone that aliens were landing. So what we do is wait for Reese to fall asleep, then we flash some lights outside his window then we go to the TV, but we'll have already made a tape... Malcolm: Dewey, you're totally over-thinking this. Reese, aliens landed down the street! Reese: [Runs in wearing a helmet and carrying a bat] Every man for himself!
＃１６（７９）
＃１７（８０）
＃１８（８１）	Malcolm: Kathy, Hi Kathy McCulskey: Hey, [roles eyes at Donny] Kathy McCulskey: You didn't tell me there were gonna be other guys here. Malcolm: Yeah, well- Kathy McCulskey: Just because you read something on a bathroom wall, doesn't mean its true.
＃１９（８２）
＃２０（８３）	Lois: Mother, we can't afford to put you up here. Grandma Ida: You can afford a maid. Piama: I'm not the maid, Ida. My name is Piama. I'm married to Francis. Grandma Ida: [to Lois] Tell the help not to talk to me. Grandma Ida: [knocking on the front door] Are you going to open the door, or should I lie down in the grass and feed the worms? Francis: Oh, great. Who opened the gates of hell?
＃２１（８４）	Lois: Francis, you can do this. Just stick your hands inside mommy and pull the baby out! [Francis has just delivered Jamie] Lois: You can go vomit now. [the paramedics show up] Paramedic Dave: I told you we shouldn't have stopped for coffee. Francis: There has to be some way to get rid of her. Piama: All we know is she doesn't burn. Reese: I've been kind of zoning in and out here, but did she just say milk comes out of those things? Malcolm: Reese, that's what they're for. Reese: My God. Women are the cows of people. Reese: I'd say half of all our Legos have been through this kid. Dewey: Probably more. Grandma Ida: Guess why your soup tasted different when you came back from bathroom.	救急隊員「コーヒーショップ寄ってる場合じゃなかった」 R「女って、ウシ人間だったのかよ！」
＃２２（８５）	Hal: [referring to Francis] You honestly don't see your part in all of this? Parents' Weekend at the military school, you two got into swordfight. You dragged him off the field in the middle of a Tee-Ball game because you thought he gave you a look. His first words were, 'You shut up.' Lois, you two have been at each other's throats since the day he was born. Lois: [pause] He started it. Reese: [singing] Amazing race, How sweet the taste / That saved a wrench for me. / I once was in the lost and found / was blind, but found my keys. Dewey: [to the Bible teacher Helen] Like Pastor Roy said, how God is so much bigger and wiser than us, and trying to see what He's thinking would be like an ant trying to see what I'm thinking. Helen: Yes, exactly. But we can trust in His wisdom, and have faith that He is watching over us. Dewey: Like me with the anthill in my backyard. I spent days watching the ants, trying to figure out which ones were good, and which ones were bad, but they all just looked like ants, so I started smiting all of them. Helen: Well that's not - Dewey: I was smiting them with the garden hose, and with lighter fluid, and with the lawnmower, and to be perfectly honest, I think I went a little crazy with the shovel. Those ants could have been praying to me all day, I wouldn't have heard them. [ponders] Dewey: There was nothing they could do about it. Helen: But, I don't think - Dewey: Really, it's the same with us. There's nothing we can do about anything either, so why worry about it? Hey, this is making me feel better. Helen: Well, that's good, but - Dewey: I guess all we can do is live our lives with as much kindness and decency as possible, and try not to dwell on God standing over us with a giant shovel. Bye!	Ｄ「神様は僕たちより偉くて賢い。アリが人の考え読めないように、神様の考えは謎だ。　蟻塚に居るときの僕みたいかも。どれも同じに見える。だから全部つぶすの。シャベルでバシバシたたきつぶしたこともあるよ。アリは必死で祈ってたかもしれないけど、ボクには聞こえない。アリに出来る事なんて無いんだ！　人間だって同じ、僕たちに出来ることは何もない。気にしなくていいね。僕らにできるのは、なるべく思いやりを持って、正しい生活をすること。神様がでっかいシャベルを持って立ってることは忘れなきゃ」

シーズン５

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（８６）
＃２（８７）	Lois: Oh, my God. Is that a newspaper diaper? Reese: These girls want to fool around with us. Malcolm: Only because we're losers. Reese: Hey. We're riding in a limo we didn't pay for. We're about to make out with hot girls who don't even like us. I don't know what we are, but we are not losers. [Malcolm, Reese and Stevie have been picked up by some girls who want to use them to make their boyfriends jealous] Malcolm: Haven't you thought about where this is going? Her boyfriend is Aaron Seponevic. Have you ever seen that guy? If he sees you making out with his girlfriend, he's gonna kill you! Reese: I know. Malcolm: Then why are you... Reese: Because anything's better than the way things are now! I've had this cute lab partner in science for eight weeks now. Her name is Cheryl. I finally left Cheryl a note on her desk asking her out. And when she read it, she turned to me and said: "Do you know who Reese is?". So then she says, "Does ANYBODY know who Reese is?", and everybody shrugged. So I said, "Probably some nobody". And you know what? I was right. Limo Driver: Wow... that's awful, kid. You wanna wear my hat? Reese: So tonight, I'm gonna fix that. From now on, when I walk by, people are gonna say, "What happened to that guy's face?". And someone'll say, "That's Reese. He made out with Aaron Seponevic's girlfriend." And I can live with that.
＃３（８８）
＃４（８９）	Reese: Dad, remember the chocolate souffle I made for Thanksgiving two years ago? Hal: Oh, yeah, that was... Reese: RAT PUKE compared to what I have planned. The crêpes I made last Thanksgiving? Hal: Oh, they were... Reese: CRAP next to what we're having tonight. Don't think of this as a meal. This is like eating the Mona Lisa.
＃５（９０）
＃６（９１）	Francis: [to Dewey] I was a terrible brother to Malcolm and Reese. I treated them way worse than they treat you. You know that scar on Reese's back? That's from a bayonet. Where did I even get a bayonet?
＃７（９２）
＃８（９３）	Malcolm: The whole neighborhood hates us so much that they throw a giant celebration just because we're gone. Lois: Malcolm, that's not news. I'm just surprised they're so organized. Reese: Don't worry. If I'd wanted to beat you up, you'd all be hanging by your underpants by now. Malcolm: I'm just saying, kids should not be blamed for how terrible their parents are. I mean, if Saddam Hussein had a son - well, maybe that's not the best example.	Ｍ「僕たちの留守に合わせてパーティやるくらい嫌われてるんだ！」Ｌ「あら、知らなかった？」
＃９（９４）
＃１０（９５）
＃１１（９６）
＃１２（９７）
＃１３（９８）	Susan: Victim? I became a victim on my prom night when I walked into the garage and found my boyfriend having sex with my sister on the hood of my car! Dewey: Where do I look? Malcolm: There's no where to look!	D「どこ見てればいいの？」 M「ダメだ、どこも見るんじゃない」
＃１４（９９）
＃１５（１００）
＃１６（１０１）
＃１７（１０２）
＃１８（１０３）
＃１９（１０４）
＃２０（１０５）
＃２１（１０６）	Sgt. Hendrix: Are you sure you're 18? Reese: Yes, and here's the I.D. to prove it. [shows him a fake I.D] Sgt. Hendrix: All right then, Private Jetson.
＃２２（１０７）

シーズン６

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（１０８）
＃２（１０９）
＃３（１１０）
＃４（１１１）
＃５（１１２）
＃６（１１３）
＃７（１１４）
＃８（１１５）
＃９（１１６）	Malcolm: [being about to suffocate in his car] Stevie was right... and so was Reese. This makes it easier. I don't want to live in a world where Reese is right.	Ｍ「スティービーの言うとおりだ、リースも…　車でも競馬でも正しかった。それならいいか、リースが正しい世界になんて生きたくない」
＃１０（１１７）
＃１１（１１８）
＃１２（１１９）	[Hal continues pretending to have Hysterical Conversion Disorder as he continues using his feet and rips off sheets of toilet paper] Lois: It's been four days, Hal. I tried to be patient, but this has gone one long enough. You have to snap out of it. Look I admit you've been resourceful and you've learned to do so many things. And the Sex has been interesting. [She walks in as Hal is now using his feet to pour in some tooth paste on his to his tooth brush to brush his teeth. He raises his brush to do so and she walks into the master bedroom] Lois: But you can't go on living like this. Don't think I don't know what this is all about. You're trying to avoid making this decision. This isn't going to work and frankly this is beneath you. It's the cowards way out, Hal. You don't think I don't like a paralyzed vacation. Everyone waiting on me hand and foot. You know what? It doesn't work that way. You can't keep making up ridiculous illnesses to get out of what you don't want to do. [sees Hal pulling out a long thread of dental floss to floss his teeth] Lois: Oh for God's sake. Do you have any idea how insane you're acting? I'm just glad your boys aren't here to see this. [sees Hal raise his feet to floss his teeth] Lois: Oh Hal, you changed Jamie's diapers with those feet. [she leaves disgusted] Reese: [about fighting dirty] Now, the first thing you need to know is that this is all about pride. Do you have pride, Craig? Craig Feldspar: Yes. Reese: Okay, that is not the answer I was looking for. You show me a man with pride and I'll show you a man with limited options.	Ｌ「今まで我慢してきたけど、もう４日よ。いい加減にして。確かに足で何でもできるようになったし、セックスも楽しいわ。」Ｌ「でもこのままじゃダメ。あなたの胸の内はわかってる。決断を避けてるだけでしょ。こんなのあなたらしくない。臆病者のすることよ。私だって病気になりたいわよ、だって楽できるもの。でもそんなの甘い考えよ。イヤなことを避けるために病気になるなんて。」Ｌ「もうやめて。こんなのバカバカしすぎる。子供には見せないでね。Ｌ「ジェイミーのおむつを交換した足よ」Ｒ「これは誇りをかけた戦いだ。誇りはあるか？」Ｃ「ああ」Ｒ「何だよ、その返事は。誇りを見せれば、技を教えてやる」
＃１３（１２０）
＃１４（１２１）
＃１５（１２２）
＃１６（１２３）
＃１７（１２４）
＃１８（１２５）
＃１９（１２６）
＃２０（１２７）
＃２１（１２８）
＃２２（１２９）

シーズン７

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（１３０）
＃２（１３１）
＃３（１３２）
＃４（１３３）
＃５（１３４）
＃６（１３５）	Lois: Good morning Reece; you going to get a job today? Reese Wilkerson: You know I had a job Mom and looking back on the whole experience I've come to the conclusion that it's just not for me. I am done with the job thing. Lois: I am sorry Reece but not working isn't one of your options. Reese Wilkerson: Okay I think I know what's going on here. Now look I want you to know that I am not criticizing you and Dad. You obviously don't mind wasting your lives doing meaningless repetitive tasks for unappreciative bosses. I respect that. Lois: Do you mind telling me what you intend to do? Reese Wilkerson: I'd like to finish my cereal. Lois: Alright Reece. That's it! I am tired of fighting you on this. Until you get a job, this free ride is over. Lois: It smells like dead squirrels in the wall again Hal. Oh my God it's you Reece! You smell like an open sewer! Reese Wilkerson: And whose fault is that? Lois: Yours. All you have to do to stop this nonsense is get a job. Reese Wilkerson: Excuse me but I think I made it pretty clear where I stand on that issue. Lois: Well you can't stay here like this. Reese Wilkerson: Is that an apology? Lois: No it is an invitation to live in the backyard.
＃７（１３６）
＃８（１３７）
＃９（１３８）
＃１０（１３９）
＃１１（）
＃１２（）
＃１３（）
＃１４（）
＃１５（）
＃１６（）
＃１７（）
＃１８（）
＃１９（）
＃２０（）
＃２１（）
＃２２（）	Reese: What did I miss? Malcolm: There was this big explosion. Some fire shot out and now he's just come to. Reese: What I was just gone for a second. Dewey: Shhhhhhh! I wanna see this. Lois: [walks in and sees Hal attempting to fix the TV] Oh for God's sakes, Hal. Pay the money and get a repair man. Hal: I am not wasting good money when I am perfectly capable of... [Hal is electrocuted and the boys laugh at it as Lois leaves embarrassed] Piama: [Reese's septic barrel has just exploded over everyone] Well we might as well go ahead and have kids, since I'm not afraid of changing diapers anymore.

　　エピソード紹介へ戻る

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（１７）
＃２（１８）	Malcolm: Apparently the difference between a stink bomb and a Level 3 toxic biohazard is two extra drops of sulfur tetraoxide. I am totally suing that Web site.
＃３（１９）
＃４（２０）
＃５（２１）
＃６（２２）
＃７（２３）
＃８（２４）
＃９（２５）
＃１０（２６）	Malcolm: Those guys are nuts. I'm funny!... Aren't I funny? Lloyd: To be honest, you can be a little caustic. Stevie: The word... is arrogant. Dabney: How about bitter, sarcastic and handsome? [Lloyd and Stevie turn to look at him] Dabney: [points somewhere] Hey, she's cute. Rick: Remember me? 'Moby Rick'? [sarcastic] Rick: That was so hilarious. Malcolm: I never called you Moby Rick. I called you Rickapotamus, although... [Rick punches him]	「オレをバカにしたろ、太めのジョナサンって呼んで」Ｍ「違うよ、重めのジョナサンって言ったんだ」
＃１１（２７）	Hal: Reese, one man's purse is another man's backpack. Hal: One boy's purse is another boy's book bag... if he's European. Besides, I can't tell you how many times I've been jealous of your mother and her purse. You know, we men have to shove our whole lives in a little square of leather, that we then have to sit on. Reese: [Yelling at Dewey while throwing rocks at him] I'm trying to protect you. Mrs. Griffen: What are you? Malcolm: You mean like, how old? Mrs. Griffen: No, what are you? Pollack? Swede? Hipachi? Malcolm: I really don't know. Mrs. Griffen: Aw, a mutt. Well, whatever you are, stay away from my liquor.
＃１２（２８）
＃１３（２９）	Dewey: Their gnome wants to eat me. It's evil. Lois: They're all evil, sweetie. Reese: I'm completely defenseless. Malcolm: Reese, she's four. You're bigger and smarter than... well, you're bigger.
＃１４（３０）
＃１５（３１）	Lois: You brought a live grenade into my home. ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE? Grandpa Victor: Because of what just happened, you want us to loan you $3,000? Hal: Please. I know you're uncomfortable loaning to family, so let me be clear. With one phone call, I could have your asses thrown in jail for child endangerment. So, this money I'm asking for is not a loan. It's blackmail. Grandma Ida: He's like your cousin Vaslefdt all over again.
＃１６（３２）
＃１７（３３）	Lois: Malcolm, what are you walking like that? Malcolm: My side still hurts. Lois: But it's the weekend.
＃１８（３４）
＃１９（３５）
＃２０（３６）
＃２１（３７）	Reese, Malcolm: Happy Dance, Happy Dance, we love to do the Happy Dance. Francis: Happier. Reese, Malcolm: Happy Dance, Happy Dance, we love to do the Happy Dance.
＃２２（３８）
＃２３（３９）	Malcolm: Reese, we are not leaving Stevie behind. Reese: Maybe it's his time, what do we know? Who are we to play God?
＃２４（４０）
＃２５（４１）	Lois: You put the baby in the closet? Hal: You left the milk on the table? [Hal is trying to educate two-year-old Reese] Hal: [singing to the tune of 1812 overture] Art / Mona Lisa was by Da Vinci / Science / The Radio was made by Marconi / Math / 9 is the product of 3 times 3 / Natural Science / Darwin once said we all come from monkeys / But not literally. Lois: [nine months pregnant with Malcolm] Someone's benefiting from that, and it's not Reese. [close-up of Lois' enlarged chest] Lois: He's two years old and still calls you "phone". [Hal leaves] Young Reese: Phone go bye-bye.	Ｌ「まだ２才（リース）で、あなたを電話って呼んでる」

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（４２）	Reese: Here's proof that I went to that all-girls camp. I have this thong right here. Malcolm: That's probably just Mom's. Reese: If it were Mom's, would I do this? [puts nose into thong and inhales through nose]
＃２（４３）
＃３（４４）
＃４（４５）
＃５（４６）
＃６（４７）
＃７（４８）	Lois: I am not canceling Christmas, I'm just holding it hostage. Hal: You are a wonderful mother and you're a wonderful person. Francis: [On the phone] Hey Mom, it's Francis. I just want you to know that I am disgusted with the way you treat Grandma. Abandoning a helpless old woman on Christmas. I hope you're ashamed of yourself. Francis: What are these doing in your closet? Grandma Ida: They're gifts. For the family, for relatives. For friends. Francis: But you never give presents... Oh my God, Donatello with pizza-throwing action? I wanted one of these when I was six. Grandma Ida: I know you did. I bought that for you. And then, right before Christmas, your mommy put you on the phone, you called me "poopie" and hung up. Grandma Ida: You do this to torture me? To hurt me? Francis: You don't like Christmas music? Grandma Ida: It sounds like the song they sang when they would run through the villages and throw the babies into the fire. Francis: They sang Jingle Bells? Grandma Ida: They sang something. Francis: Why don't you just unhinge your jaw and finish me off? Grandma Ida: After my Magnum P.I. Francis: Why don't you do the entire family a favor, and just die? Malcolm: Hey. This is supposed to be to Dewey from both us. Reese: I picked it out. Malcolm: I stepped in it. Dewey: She's stealing Christmas. Malcolm: Mom, you can't do this. Reese: Yeah, this is the last year Dewey'll believe in Santa Claus. Dewey: What? Grandma Ida: I should've kissed your boo-boos and made them better. I was supposed to tell the bad little boy stories and bake you giant sugar cookies and knit you nice, fluffy sweaters. I should've carried you and held you and told you how much I loved your diapers.	R「来年はデューイがサンタを信じてないかもしれないのに？」
＃８（４９）
＃９（５０）
＃１０（５１）	Lois: Oh, my God, is that right? What time do you have? Cashier: 5:45? Lois: 5:45. That's not possible. Dropped off Malcolm, picked up Reese, dinner is in the oven. Hah? Cashier: What is it? Lois: I have the next 25 minutes free. Cashier: How did you manage that? Did you leave a kid somewhere? Lois: No. No, they are all accounted for. Cashier: What're you gonna do?
＃１１（５２）
＃１２（５３）
＃１３（５４）	Malcolm: Why do we have to get dressed up for Reese's court date? Lois: So the judge will see that he comes from a good family who loves him. Dewey: Why aren't they trying him as an adult? [Reese wants to get his learner's permit] Hal: Reese surrounded by 6,000 pounds of steel and 20 gallons of explosive fuel. It's like giving a shark a submachine gun. Teen: I can't believe I have to be in the same car as a low life like you! Reese: Oh, I'm a low-life? You're the one that spends everyday at lunch sucking on a straw that's been under my armpit.
＃１４（５５）	Hal: [Trying to fly a kite, and gets wrapped up in the string] I'm sick of this! I HATE KITES! I HAVE ALWAYS HATED KITES!!!
＃１５（５６）	Lois: Sorry it's so cramped, Piama. This van really isn't designed to carry seven people. Piama: Oh, I guess I was thrown off by the seven seats and the seven seatbelts.
＃１６（５７）	Reese: So, "Dad", you gonna ground me? Ed: Geez, your counselor was furious. Reese: All right, now that that's done, why don't we just go home? I could jump in your Jacuzzi, and you could throw something on the barbecue for me. Ed: I have a better idea. Why don't we just go home? I could jump in myJacuzzi, and you could throw something on the barbecue for me. Reese: What are you talking about? Ed: Well, let's just say, that with the information your counselor gave me, I could call your mom, and you won't see daylight for years. Reese: Oh, yeah? Well, I'll tell your secret to your wife. Ed: Well, I guess the question is, am I more scared of my wife... or are you more scared of your mother? Stevie: Social skills 10? Malcolm: I have social skills, jackass. Dewey: Eat chalk, evil-doer.
＃１７（５８）	Commandant Edwin Spangler: [after Francis found him another job in a retirement home] You call that a collage. It is an insult to the craft, I can see paste coming up from the popsicle stick. Inuit Woman: I'm sorry, I have arthritis. Commandant Edwin Spangler: That's it, you have just lost pudding for the whole group. Feel free to thank Mrs. Meektijuk after I leave. [the former Commandant Spangler leaves and other eldery residents started despising him the same way Francis and Eric did at Marlin Academy]
＃１８（５９）
＃１９（６０）	Dr. Kennedy: And how do see your place in this family? Dewey: Well, I'm the favorite. You know, the one everybody loves the most. The cute one, the one everybody looks out for and gives presents to. And sometimes they even make the birds sing to me or the clouds spell out my name.
＃２０（６１）
＃２１（６２）
＃２２（６３）

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（６４）
＃２（６５）
＃３（６６）
＃４（６７）
＃５（６８）
＃６（６９）
＃７（７０）
＃８（７１）	Otto: How far do you think we've gone? Hal: Well, judging by that rock formation over there, about twelve feet. Francis: [having lit a huge firecracker] Did it say when our vision would come back? Reese: Box said two days. Francis: Totally worth it. Dewey: I kind of feel like I'm floating. Gretchen: Vell, zat's probably ze ammonia.
＃９（７２）
＃１０（７３）
＃１１（７４）
＃１２（７５）
＃１３（７６）	Hal: [Hiding in a playhouse] You're an idiot. Everybody in this playhouse is an idiot. Teen: Ha ha, you just called yourself an idiot.
＃１４（７７）
＃１５（７８）	Policeman: Sir, do you know why I pulled you over? Hal: Certainly not for operating an illegal pirate radio station. I mean, even if I did have the equipment in college, I wouldn't have kept it and be using it today. What's with all these questions? Do you have a warrant? Hal: And then the stop sign army springs into action all in support of the military industrial country club complex. Dewey: Malcolm, in school we learned the coolest thing: there were these people that did this broadcast to convince everyone that aliens were landing. So what we do is wait for Reese to fall asleep, then we flash some lights outside his window then we go to the TV, but we'll have already made a tape... Malcolm: Dewey, you're totally over-thinking this. Reese, aliens landed down the street! Reese: [Runs in wearing a helmet and carrying a bat] Every man for himself!
＃１６（７９）
＃１７（８０）
＃１８（８１）	Malcolm: Kathy, Hi Kathy McCulskey: Hey, [roles eyes at Donny] Kathy McCulskey: You didn't tell me there were gonna be other guys here. Malcolm: Yeah, well- Kathy McCulskey: Just because you read something on a bathroom wall, doesn't mean its true.
＃１９（８２）
＃２０（８３）	Lois: Mother, we can't afford to put you up here. Grandma Ida: You can afford a maid. Piama: I'm not the maid, Ida. My name is Piama. I'm married to Francis. Grandma Ida: [to Lois] Tell the help not to talk to me. Grandma Ida: [knocking on the front door] Are you going to open the door, or should I lie down in the grass and feed the worms? Francis: Oh, great. Who opened the gates of hell?
＃２１（８４）	Lois: Francis, you can do this. Just stick your hands inside mommy and pull the baby out! [Francis has just delivered Jamie] Lois: You can go vomit now. [the paramedics show up] Paramedic Dave: I told you we shouldn't have stopped for coffee. Francis: There has to be some way to get rid of her. Piama: All we know is she doesn't burn. Reese: I've been kind of zoning in and out here, but did she just say milk comes out of those things? Malcolm: Reese, that's what they're for. Reese: My God. Women are the cows of people. Reese: I'd say half of all our Legos have been through this kid. Dewey: Probably more. Grandma Ida: Guess why your soup tasted different when you came back from bathroom.	救急隊員「コーヒーショップ寄ってる場合じゃなかった」 R「女って、ウシ人間だったのかよ！」
＃２２（８５）	Hal: [referring to Francis] You honestly don't see your part in all of this? Parents' Weekend at the military school, you two got into swordfight. You dragged him off the field in the middle of a Tee-Ball game because you thought he gave you a look. His first words were, 'You shut up.' Lois, you two have been at each other's throats since the day he was born. Lois: [pause] He started it. Reese: [singing] Amazing race, How sweet the taste / That saved a wrench for me. / I once was in the lost and found / was blind, but found my keys. Dewey: [to the Bible teacher Helen] Like Pastor Roy said, how God is so much bigger and wiser than us, and trying to see what He's thinking would be like an ant trying to see what I'm thinking. Helen: Yes, exactly. But we can trust in His wisdom, and have faith that He is watching over us. Dewey: Like me with the anthill in my backyard. I spent days watching the ants, trying to figure out which ones were good, and which ones were bad, but they all just looked like ants, so I started smiting all of them. Helen: Well that's not - Dewey: I was smiting them with the garden hose, and with lighter fluid, and with the lawnmower, and to be perfectly honest, I think I went a little crazy with the shovel. Those ants could have been praying to me all day, I wouldn't have heard them. [ponders] Dewey: There was nothing they could do about it. Helen: But, I don't think - Dewey: Really, it's the same with us. There's nothing we can do about anything either, so why worry about it? Hey, this is making me feel better. Helen: Well, that's good, but - Dewey: I guess all we can do is live our lives with as much kindness and decency as possible, and try not to dwell on God standing over us with a giant shovel. Bye!	Ｄ「神様は僕たちより偉くて賢い。アリが人の考え読めないように、神様の考えは謎だ。　蟻塚に居るときの僕みたいかも。どれも同じに見える。だから全部つぶすの。シャベルでバシバシたたきつぶしたこともあるよ。アリは必死で祈ってたかもしれないけど、ボクには聞こえない。アリに出来る事なんて無いんだ！　人間だって同じ、僕たちに出来ることは何もない。気にしなくていいね。僕らにできるのは、なるべく思いやりを持って、正しい生活をすること。神様がでっかいシャベルを持って立ってることは忘れなきゃ」

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（８６）
＃２（８７）	Lois: Oh, my God. Is that a newspaper diaper? Reese: These girls want to fool around with us. Malcolm: Only because we're losers. Reese: Hey. We're riding in a limo we didn't pay for. We're about to make out with hot girls who don't even like us. I don't know what we are, but we are not losers. [Malcolm, Reese and Stevie have been picked up by some girls who want to use them to make their boyfriends jealous] Malcolm: Haven't you thought about where this is going? Her boyfriend is Aaron Seponevic. Have you ever seen that guy? If he sees you making out with his girlfriend, he's gonna kill you! Reese: I know. Malcolm: Then why are you... Reese: Because anything's better than the way things are now! I've had this cute lab partner in science for eight weeks now. Her name is Cheryl. I finally left Cheryl a note on her desk asking her out. And when she read it, she turned to me and said: "Do you know who Reese is?". So then she says, "Does ANYBODY know who Reese is?", and everybody shrugged. So I said, "Probably some nobody". And you know what? I was right. Limo Driver: Wow... that's awful, kid. You wanna wear my hat? Reese: So tonight, I'm gonna fix that. From now on, when I walk by, people are gonna say, "What happened to that guy's face?". And someone'll say, "That's Reese. He made out with Aaron Seponevic's girlfriend." And I can live with that.
＃３（８８）
＃４（８９）	Reese: Dad, remember the chocolate souffle I made for Thanksgiving two years ago? Hal: Oh, yeah, that was... Reese: RAT PUKE compared to what I have planned. The crêpes I made last Thanksgiving? Hal: Oh, they were... Reese: CRAP next to what we're having tonight. Don't think of this as a meal. This is like eating the Mona Lisa.
＃５（９０）
＃６（９１）	Francis: [to Dewey] I was a terrible brother to Malcolm and Reese. I treated them way worse than they treat you. You know that scar on Reese's back? That's from a bayonet. Where did I even get a bayonet?
＃７（９２）
＃８（９３）	Malcolm: The whole neighborhood hates us so much that they throw a giant celebration just because we're gone. Lois: Malcolm, that's not news. I'm just surprised they're so organized. Reese: Don't worry. If I'd wanted to beat you up, you'd all be hanging by your underpants by now. Malcolm: I'm just saying, kids should not be blamed for how terrible their parents are. I mean, if Saddam Hussein had a son - well, maybe that's not the best example.	Ｍ「僕たちの留守に合わせてパーティやるくらい嫌われてるんだ！」Ｌ「あら、知らなかった？」
＃９（９４）
＃１０（９５）
＃１１（９６）
＃１２（９７）
＃１３（９８）	Susan: Victim? I became a victim on my prom night when I walked into the garage and found my boyfriend having sex with my sister on the hood of my car! Dewey: Where do I look? Malcolm: There's no where to look!	D「どこ見てればいいの？」 M「ダメだ、どこも見るんじゃない」
＃１４（９９）
＃１５（１００）
＃１６（１０１）
＃１７（１０２）
＃１８（１０３）
＃１９（１０４）
＃２０（１０５）
＃２１（１０６）	Sgt. Hendrix: Are you sure you're 18? Reese: Yes, and here's the I.D. to prove it. [shows him a fake I.D] Sgt. Hendrix: All right then, Private Jetson.
＃２２（１０７）

Season No.	迷言（元セリフ）	迷言（翻訳）
＃１（１０８）
＃２（１０９）
＃３（１１０）
＃４（１１１）
＃５（１１２）
＃６（１１３）
＃７（１１４）
＃８（１１５）
＃９（１１６）	Malcolm: [being about to suffocate in his car] Stevie was right... and so was Reese. This makes it easier. I don't want to live in a world where Reese is right.	Ｍ「スティービーの言うとおりだ、リースも…　車でも競馬でも正しかった。それならいいか、リースが正しい世界になんて生きたくない」
＃１０（１１７）
＃１１（１１８）
＃１２（１１９）	[Hal continues pretending to have Hysterical Conversion Disorder as he continues using his feet and rips off sheets of toilet paper] Lois: It's been four days, Hal. I tried to be patient, but this has gone one long enough. You have to snap out of it. Look I admit you've been resourceful and you've learned to do so many things. And the Sex has been interesting. [She walks in as Hal is now using his feet to pour in some tooth paste on his to his tooth brush to brush his teeth. He raises his brush to do so and she walks into the master bedroom] Lois: But you can't go on living like this. Don't think I don't know what this is all about. You're trying to avoid making this decision. This isn't going to work and frankly this is beneath you. It's the cowards way out, Hal. You don't think I don't like a paralyzed vacation. Everyone waiting on me hand and foot. You know what? It doesn't work that way. You can't keep making up ridiculous illnesses to get out of what you don't want to do. [sees Hal pulling out a long thread of dental floss to floss his teeth] Lois: Oh for God's sake. Do you have any idea how insane you're acting? I'm just glad your boys aren't here to see this. [sees Hal raise his feet to floss his teeth] Lois: Oh Hal, you changed Jamie's diapers with those feet. [she leaves disgusted] Reese: [about fighting dirty] Now, the first thing you need to know is that this is all about pride. Do you have pride, Craig? Craig Feldspar: Yes. Reese: Okay, that is not the answer I was looking for. You show me a man with pride and I'll show you a man with limited options.	Ｌ「今まで我慢してきたけど、もう４日よ。いい加減にして。確かに足で何でもできるようになったし、セックスも楽しいわ。」Ｌ「でもこのままじゃダメ。あなたの胸の内はわかってる。決断を避けてるだけでしょ。こんなのあなたらしくない。臆病者のすることよ。私だって病気になりたいわよ、だって楽できるもの。でもそんなの甘い考えよ。イヤなことを避けるために病気になるなんて。」Ｌ「もうやめて。こんなのバカバカしすぎる。子供には見せないでね。Ｌ「ジェイミーのおむつを交換した足よ」Ｒ「これは誇りをかけた戦いだ。誇りはあるか？」Ｃ「ああ」Ｒ「何だよ、その返事は。誇りを見せれば、技を教えてやる」
＃１３（１２０）
＃１４（１２１）
＃１５（１２２）
＃１６（１２３）
＃１７（１２４）
＃１８（１２５）
＃１９（１２６）
＃２０（１２７）
＃２１（１２８）
＃２２（１２９）